IM LEARNING :D

I'm finally learning to stand on my own 2 feet and help myself out rather than relying on other people.
Specially now uni is over, i wont be seeing my best friend pretty much every day so the days we do meet up cannot be negative, hense why im learning!!
Understanding ALOT of things right now, me and you are never gona happen yet i think youll always have a little place in my heart, YOU just need to learn to stand up for yourself and to stand on your own 2 feet then youll never be walked all over again.
It's now been 8 months since becomming single, im off to paris in less than a month and off to florida in exactly 3 months (minus a day) and im becomming totally content with myself.
Even to the point where i handed my number to a guy yesterday. . .i NEVER make the first move, or in fact, id NEVER have the confidence to do what i did yesterday EVER!!
I keep buying new clothes atm but thats ok, its a whole new me, who wants to wear seasme street tshirts and stuff like that any more? im 21, a (nearly) graduate and moving out into the big wide world.
A £30 shopping spree never hurt anyone!! (it kinda does when 2 holidays in the space of 3 months burnt a MASSIVE hole on my bank account) but still. . .you only live once and dad my papa told me yesterday "stay as young as you can for as long as you can"
So what if this Jordan kid never gets in touch with me, atleast i tried!!
He has till Sunday to say yes or no and im not gona let it get to me cos i no longer let men rule my life!!
Fair i still get lonely at night sometimes but thats life!!
My friendship with Tom isnt that great atm either, ever since he got back from holiday we barely speak, i do the whole LET HIM GET INTOUCH WITH ME FIRST now and it works most days!!
Besides, i think SHE is slowly winding herself back into his life again which means im slowly being pushed out of his life. . .fair. . .its pay back, im owed a "FUCK OFF" from him for a year!!

1 thing that bugs me big time is my lack of friends, the friends i do have are the most amazing people in the world, but none of them live in Weston, their all a 2 hour (min) journey away so i cant just be all OH HEY WANA GO FOR A COFFEE IN ABIT?! i cant do that with tom either.
Hes off to Download Festival this weekend and i THINK julya is going. . .apperently he booked his ticket way back in April but still went on about wanting to go till a few weeks ago then was all WHY DID I NEED TO TELL YOU I WAS GONIG?!. . uummmm conversation perhaps?
So hes gona get laid this weekend but its ok, im off to Wrexham this weekend to see Miss Dawn Jones :) = lots of drinking, lots of eating and lots of BBQ times

I dont think me and tom were ever best friends, just a convienence. . .im tempted to make a move on him via text this week to see what happens, just cos he always used to be "WEBCAM?!" and i fell for it every time. . .now i wana see if i was just a convienent for him or if hes just as big of a sleese bag as most men. . .thats if i can get hold of him, hes never around no more atm.
ARK WELL